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Children are natural explorers. They test boundaries, ask questions, and push limits — this is how they learn. But as parents, we also know there are times when behaviours cross lines, or when children encounter unsafe situations, including behaviours that may feel confusing or sexualised.
The Protective Behaviours program, used widely in Western Australia, equips children with simple, age-appropriate tools to understand their right to safety. At its heart are two empowering themes:
We all have the right to feel safe at all times.
We can talk with someone about anything, even if it feels awful or small.
These themes are not just slogans — they’re lifelines. They remind children that their feelings matter, that their body belongs to them, and that trusted adults are always available to help.
Parents often ask: How do I know what’s normal?
Normal behaviour: Curious questions about bodies, imitation of adults, playful role-play.
Unsafe behaviour: Persistent, aggressive, secretive, or age-inappropriate sexualised behaviours.
Protective Behaviours doesn’t label children as “bad.” Instead, it gives them the language to express feelings and seek help, while giving parents tools to guide, redirect, and respond calmly.
Protective Behaviours is most powerful when children learn simple, repeatable phrases that put control back in their hands. Some of the key ones include:
“Stop it, I don’t like it.”
This short phrase gives children permission to assert themselves when someone’s actions — even a peer’s rough play — make them uncomfortable.
“My body, my rules.”
This phrase reminds children (and others) that personal boundaries must be respected. Parents can model this at home by reinforcing that hugs, kisses, and tickles are always optional.
“I can talk to someone I trust.”
Children are taught to identify five trusted adults they can turn to if something feels unsafe — a parent, teacher, grandparent, neighbour, or coach.
Using these words often at home makes them second nature, so children know how to act when faced with uncomfortable situations.
Here’s how parents can bring these lessons into daily routines:
Body Autonomy in Everyday Life
Let children choose if they want hugs or kisses.
Teach them that “no” is a complete sentence.
Respect their choices, showing them their boundaries matter.
Safe and Unsafe Secrets
Safe secret: planning a surprise party.
Unsafe secret: something that makes them feel worried, scared, or bad inside.
Teach them: “We don’t keep unsafe secrets.”
Feelings and Early Warning Signs
Help children recognise body signals like butterflies in the tummy, sweaty palms, or a racing heart.
Teach them these signals mean: “Something doesn’t feel right.”
Trusted Adults and Networks
Create a “Helping Hand” drawing where each finger names a trusted adult.
Practice: “Who could you talk to if you felt unsafe at school?”
When children display sexualised behaviour, parents may feel shocked or worried. Protective Behaviours encourages parents to:
Stay calm. Overreacting may create shame.
Redirect positively. “It’s okay to be curious, but let’s talk about private and public behaviours.”
Seek advice. If behaviours are persistent, secretive, or harmful, contact child protection services or a professional counsellor.
The key is to balance guidance with empathy, ensuring children feel supported rather than judged.
Imagine your child at school: another student grabs their toy roughly. Instead of crying or lashing out, your child stands tall and says, “Stop it, I don’t like it.” The other child backs off, and the teacher steps in to reinforce the message.
Or imagine at a family gathering: a well-meaning relative leans in for a kiss. Your child says, “No, thank you.” You support them, smiling and saying, “We’re teaching body autonomy.” The relative may be surprised, but your child has just practised one of the most powerful lessons of their life.
These are not small moments — they are building blocks of resilience.
Protective Behaviours is taught in classrooms, sporting groups, and community organisations. The consistent language across settings means children hear the same empowering messages at home, at school, and in care:
Everyone has the right to feel safe.
Unsafe secrets should be shared with trusted adults.
Boundaries are to be respected.
Parents can strengthen this by asking educators how they implement Protective Behaviours, and by using the same language at home.
Books and stories: Choose picture books about consent, boundaries, and feelings.
Role-play: Practise saying “Stop it, I don’t like it” in playful scenarios.
Charts and posters: Display a Helping Hand or “My Body My Rules” poster at home.
Ongoing conversations: Make protective behaviours part of normal talk, not just one-off lessons.
Some families may find these ideas new or challenging. In cultures where respect for elders includes physical affection, it may feel uncomfortable to allow children to refuse hugs. But reframing it as respecting children’s choices rather than rejecting tradition helps bridge the gap. Children can show love in other ways — high-fives, waves, or simply words of affection.
Teach the two core Protective Behaviours themes.
Practise empowering phrases: “Stop it, I don’t like it” and “My body, my rules.”
Help children identify body signals of discomfort.
Make a Helping Hand of five trusted adults.
Normalise conversations about safety and respect.
Protective Behaviours is not about making children fearful — it’s about making them strong, confident, and respectful. When children know they have the right to feel safe, and the language to assert themselves, they are better prepared to navigate friendships, family life, and the wider world.
As parents, we can reinforce this every day, in the smallest of moments. A child who says, “Stop it, I don’t like it” is not being rude — they’re exercising their right to safety. And a child who proudly declares, “My body, my rules” is not defiant — they’re learning the first lessons of self-respect.
Protective Behaviours gives our children a gift that lasts a lifetime: the confidence to speak up, the wisdom to trust their instincts, and the reassurance that they are never alone.
Read more: https://wacss.com.au/programs/protective-behaviours/